On Beauty Queens, Drama Queens, Tiaras and Marriage Equality
Image by vrysxy via FlickrI know, I know...I should have said something by now.
I'm talking, of course, about the brouhaha created when my mortal enemy, He Who Shall Not Be Linked, decided to start a very public bitchslap war with Miss California at the Miss USA pageant. In the interview round, he sucker-punched her with a question on gay marriage, and she had the balls to tell him (to his face!) that she was agin' it. You know, on Dynasty, when Krystle and Alexis sparred like this, they threw each other into the pool. That's how a TRUE diva handles her shit, Perez.
But still the e-mails come, asking me to weigh in with my thoughts on their catfight. (I'm known, as least to my readers, as the web's preeminent Hilton-hater, thus their interest in my oh-so-bitchy response.) So here it is.
HWSNBL was a complete dick to put her on the spot, I think. But then, he's always a dick. Everyone knows this. It's his shtick. And the pageant knew who they were getting when they chose him as a judge. He's an embarrassment to gays, to serious bloggers, and to anyone that prizes intellect and culture. And apparently, he's now also an embarrassment to beauty pageants.
This doesn't let Miss California, Carrie Prejean, off the hook. Her whiny post-pageant publicity tour has revealed a quintessential sore loser, spoiled and self-absorbed. ("Woe is me! The mean homosexual asked me a hard question! The gays stole my tiara!") I say: deal with it. You decided to be a bigot on national television. This is the response that bigotry receives when you broadcast it to millions of offended gays and gay-friendly straights, who -- let's face it -- are the only ones still watching beauty pageants these days.
The conservative media's response has been, of course, that she has the right to her own opinion. That's true...although I bet if she'd advocated denying rights to other minorities -- the reinstitution of slavery, perhaps? -- she'd never have gotten away with it. The problem is that it's somehow OKAY to say you're against gay marriage, at least in conservative circles. It's OKAY to say that this group of people should never have rights or status. It's OKAY to believe that fairness isn't fundamental. (And how you justify this hateful stance with your myopic religious beliefs is beyond me...it's insane, in fact.)
So I say: Perez, you're an asshole. But Miss California, you're a bigger one. And you both deserve what you got.