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Friday, September 19, 2008

 

Imagining Emmy...

Earlier this week, Nathaniel made known his deepest-held wishes for the Emmy Awards this weekend. What a brilliant idea! I should do that. Yeah, so. Yeah!

MODFAB'S MOST DEEPLY-HELD TEN EMMY WISHES

10) That James Bobin's superbly kooky direction of Flight of the Conchords, which gives the show a wholly surprising point of view, manages to triumph over less-interesting, better-hyped competition like Pushing (Ugh) Daisies, which desperately wants you to think it's wacky and hip but instead is just The Addams Family in day-glo.

9) That John Adams loses everything. Damn, that was some boring shit.

8) That for Best Drama Series, some smart hacker gets into the voting machines and rigs a three-way tie between two brilliant newcomers (Damages and Mad Men) and the resurgent old-timer (Lost). And, as a corollary...

7) If House or Boston Legal win, I hope someone firebombs the awards ceremony.

6) That Charlie Sheen realizes he's a complete fraud and has no business being an Emmy nominee, and as a result takes cyanide before flinging himself off the nearest bridge.

5) That Glenn Close, who stands heads and tails above the other Best Drama Actress nominees, wins in a landslide. (Actually, I take that back. I hope there's a HUGE write-in vote for the best female performance on television, Mary McDonnell as President Laura Roslin...and that she wins instead. Sorry, Glenn. Come back to Broadway!)

4) That when Neil Patrick Harris wins Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy for How I Met Your Mother, he runs right over to fellow nominee and former winner Jeremy Piven and gives him a big, slobbery, full-tongue kiss. Yay homoeroticism!

3) That William Shatner does NOT win the Supporting Actor in a drama category. Not only because he's a terrible actor and an enormous ham, but because everyone else in his category -- Michael Emerson from Lost, John Slattery from Mad Men, and both Ted Dansen and Zeljko Ivanek from Damages -- were all spectacular this season.

2) That In Treatment wins something. It was the most nuanced effort at drama all year. Especially since a lot of other great shows (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Friday Night Lights, The Riches, and the vastly improved Big Brother) can't.

1) That the entire cylon mother ship brigade unexpectedly crashes the ceremony, blows everyone to smithereens, ends life in Hollywood as we know it, and declares Battlestar the greatest show in the universe. Because it is.

What are you dreaming for?
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2 Comments:

Blogger ShoNuff said...

i'm still waiting for the wire to show up. michael williams should come on stage, shotgun in hand, only to be tackled by dominic west and clarke peters.

9/19/08, 9:30 AM  
Blogger John T said...

I'll agree with you on Numbers 6,5,4, and 3, but not on 9 and definitely not on 10, which I think is the Best Comedy on TV that doesn't star Rainn Wilson.

9/21/08, 10:39 PM  

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