Signs of the Apocalypse #326: Kevin Federline...On Broadway.

Say it ain't so! At least we can take solace in the fact that, at the moment, Everything I Know I Learned From Musicals says it's just a rumor...and from US Magazine, yet. Not exactly the Times, if you get my drift. So maybe it won't actually happen, and thousands of teenage girls won't have to bleed from their eyes and run from the Palace Theatre screaming every night.

And despite his $4.99 box of hair color from the 7-Elevent, K-Fed has never been a true blond, legally or otherwise. Just thought I'd make that point, in case he's up for the role of Elle Woods.