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Monday, February 04, 2008


Wow, That's Really Uncomfortable.

There's nothing quite like turning on your favorite HGTV home design show, and the homeowners on the episode are two gay guys...one of whom you slept with in the early 90's, and the other one you kind of also slept with, separately and then together and then in a group kind of thing (it's less interesting than it sounds), and who you haven't seen since way back when. And now they're both older (we were all young then) and fatter (they were gym bunnies back in the day). And so are you. And that's depressing. Weird and depressing.

But you watch the episode anyway, and despite being older and grayer, you realize they are no wiser. They're still irritating, and you remember why you stopped being friends with them in the first place. And that's when you realize you're really, really glad to have the husband you have, who to you still looks like a rock star each and every morning.

The moral of this story: be careful who you have sex with. Because someday, they could be on basic cable.

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Blogger joe*to*hell said...



I think it is actually really embarrassing when gay guys get home design makeovers on any HGTV show. its embarrassing to gay guys everywhere. we should be hosting the shows and doing the reno, not the tasteless people in need! shameful!

thats like lesbians needing a tool lesson. or beauty pageant contestants needing a lesson in fake smiling

oh, i will be setting the tivo to every show on HGTV till i see these guys on repeat

2/4/08, 1:18 PM  
Blogger StinkyLulu said...

Truer words have ne'er been spoke.

You'll have to have me tell you my -- ahem -- golden story about a certain cable news b-lister.

2/4/08, 3:21 PM  
Blogger Barry said...

Yeah, I'm thinking most of my ex-lovers would be hard-pressed to even wind up on public access, let alone basic cable. I don't know if that says more (or less) about them or me....

2/4/08, 3:37 PM  
Blogger jason said...

Oh goodness....something tells me I may have seen that episode...

I feel like I'm 7 degrees from celebrity now!

2/4/08, 9:30 PM  
Blogger The Slabber said...

What a great story. Fantastic! And this just made me realize the same sort of thing, more or less, about a Canadian porn actor ... oh, wait. Let's not go there.

2/4/08, 11:59 PM  
Blogger Raj said...

OMG that is hilarious. I can totally relate ModFab. Once I was watching Blind Date and saw a guy on there I was with in my youth. And yes, he got rejected by a straight girl - It was too funny, but I really felt akward watching it. Raj - www.electroqueer.com

2/5/08, 6:16 AM  
Blogger William said...

Ok, I watched a few episodes of Designed to Sell yesterday and none were gay guys--you have to tell us who they were!

Usually, the gays on these shows are embarrassingly clueless--divorced dads with two kids and their new lovers. However, the other day, there was this cute couple on House Hunters from my home state of CT...

2/5/08, 9:18 AM  
Blogger DBK said...

That was the couple with the basement filled with debris, right? They were pretty annoying. Also, slobs. Can't stand slobs.

2/5/08, 1:55 PM  
Blogger Nick Davis said...

The moral of this story: be careful who you have sex with. Because someday, they could be on basic cable.

I love this blog because practical wisdom just oozes from it, like honey from a hive. But then, you already knew you were my favorite Queen Bee.

2/5/08, 5:41 PM  
Blogger Vance said...

that WAS the funniest story EVER! lol.(that or I'm real tired from traveling but I have a feeling its a funny story, tired or no tired). lol.

2/7/08, 2:46 AM  
Blogger T$ said...

This is totally hilarious...and totally relatable to those of us of a certain age.

I'd say my usual "New York is a teeny, tiny town"...but it's really the world that's a teeny, tiny place.

2/7/08, 11:25 AM  

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