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Thursday, January 18, 2007

 

The Movie Soundtrack of Your Life

Got emailed this meme today:

QUESTION: If your life is a movie, what songs are on the soundtrack?

Here's how it works:

1. Open iTunes
2. Put it on shuffle and press play
3. For every question, type the song that's playing
4. Make up a Title and choose your Cast


Title: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Formica Countertop

Cast:
Jake Gyllenhaal (as ModFab)
Tori Spelling (as Perez Hilton)
Kevin Federline (as Albert Einstein)
Gael Garcia Bernal (as ModFab's Secret Admirer)
and Special Guest Star Dame Judi Dench as M

Opening Credits: "Bad Mood", Lonnie Gordon
I can tell already...this is going to be one muthafuckin badass movie! A great start. I should do an action sequence or something.

Waking Up: "Back To Life (12" Mix)", Soul II Soul
A little sexy, a little funky...like my fine self. However do you want me, indeed.

First Day At School: "Children and Art", Maria Friedman
Wait, we can't go to show tunes this early in the movie! It is thematic, I guess...

Falling In Love: "Happy Ending", Mika
Dang, I don't even really like this song! Well, again it fits the moment. But...does it really say "Oscar-worthy movie", or does it say "very special episode of Dawson's Creek"?

Fight Song: "Space Age Love Song", A Flock of Seagulls
Ack. The gayest fight sequence ever. After a great start in the opening sequence, I'm embarrassed at how bad this movie is turning out. At least you know I'm not cheating.

Breaking Up: "A Pain That I'm Used To (2005 Jacques Lu Cont Mix)", Depeche Mode
Now THIS should be the fight song! A definite rebound from Flock of friggin' Seagulls.

Prom: "September", Earth, Wind and Fire
My favorite song of all time. Perfect. We're back, baby! Wait...am I Molly Ringwald, or am I Ducky?

Life: "Love's Divine (Deepsky Club Mix)", Seal
A great track, and the remix makes it a hip theme song for the movie. I guess. Right? Work with me, people.

Mental Breakdown: "Yummy", Gwen Stefani featuring Pharrell
Clearly, the mental breakdown is caused by anguish over how craptastic Gwen's new CD is.

Driving: "If You Really Love Me", Stevie Wonder
Not a bad driving song at all. Picture me, in Las Vegas, driving a 1950's convertible roadster wearing sunglasses and a long, flowing headwrap blowing in the wind behind me. I AM Grace Kelly.

Flashback: "The Number 1 Song in Heaven", The Sparks featuring Jimmy Somerville
Flashback, huh? Clearly, it's a really gay flashback. Either that, or Shelley Winters is swimming over from The Poseidon Adventure. That's still really gay, actually.

Wedding: "Mi Destino (Migs Summer Delight Mix)", Miguel Migs
In real life I really was a summer bride, so this house track kind of works. (My actual wedding was filled with classical music, so I guess the screenwriters are taking liberties to 'punch up the story', as they say on the Paramount lot. Hey, can Brad Pitt play my husband?)

Birth of Child: "O.G. Bitch (Smitty's Deep Guitar Mix)", Esthero
A completely nonsensical song choice...perhaps underscoring how ridiculous it is that I would ever have a child.

Final Battle: "Harper Valley P.T.A.", Jeannie C. Riley
Did I mention how frigging gay this movie is going to be?

Death Scene: "Hey Mama", Kanye West
"The characters were well drawn and the cinematography was powerful, but the whole thing fell completely apart in the final moments." - Rex Reed, The Observer

Funeral Song: "Second Time Around", Shalamar
At my funeral, apparently, my friends will be happily dancing to 70's disco. Nice. I'm DEAD, people. DEAD. Show some muthafuckin respeck.

End Credit: "Climb The Walls (Umbrella of Love)", United State of Electronica
Well, at least I end on a great party song. Still, I don't expect anyone will ask for a sequel.

I'm tagging the kings of the meme, Toons N Tunes, EdandTony, and QTA, and the kings of all media, Nathaniel, Nick, JA, and Joe.

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