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Wednesday, September 06, 2006

 

You Tube of the Week: Bond. James Bond.



The reinvention of James Bond is on its way in Casino Royale, a new origin story of the British superspy. For my money, there are bigger questions than whether Daniel Craig will be good or not. (He will be great. Count on it.) We're more concerned about the Bond trademarks: gadgets, girls, exotic locales, cars, and of course the opening credit sequences. The theme songs have always been interpreted with a blend of winking sexism and avant-garde imagination; we're of the opinion that you can tell whether the movie is going to suck or not after the opening credits finish.

You Tube has clips of almost all the previous Bond openers. Personally, we're partial to From Russia With Love's brilliant use of belly dancers and a slide projector; the Perestroika-meets-strippers vibe of Goldeneye; and of course, the fluorescent nail polish of A View to a Kill. (How can you go wrong with Duran Duran...although our favorite Bond themes are by Garbage, Shirley Bassey, and Gladys Knight.) The rest:

Diamonds Are Forever - No rhinestones here!
Die Another Day - Fire and ice!
Dr. No - Shagadelic!
For Your Eyes Only - Sheena Easton...naked!
Goldfinger - You mean, gold naked girls!
Licence to Kill - Video's crap, but Gladys Knight is hot!
Live and Let Die - Look ma, black people!
The Living Daylights - I wear my sunglasses at night!
The Man With The Golden Gun - Ripples...oooooh!
Moonraker - Trampolines, baby!
Never Say Never Again - Travel brochure...what crap is this?
Octopussy - Fun with laser pointers!
The Spy Who Loved Me - More trampolines...and guns!
Thunderball - Underwater mermaids!
Tomorrow Never Dies - Technology is a blast!
The World Is Not Enough - Women in oil...saucy minx!
You Only Live Twice - Lava, its so hot!
...and just because I love it, a Bond Theme for the next generation...
History Repeating - The Propellerheads featuring Miss Shirley Bassey
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