2007 Verve Awards

2006 Verve Awards

Best Arts and Culture Blog 2005 Queer Day Awards

Best Gay Blog Nominee 2004 Weblog Awards

Best Arts and Culture Blog Nominee

Wednesday, July 26, 2006


Memo To George Michael: Fuck Right Off

Regulars here know that ModFab is a George Michael fan, supporting him through one mediocre adult-contemporary album after another. (Our devotion has something to do with being in high school in 1986 and the "Father Figure" video; we're working it out in therapy.) But Miss Michael has pissed us off all week, and we're hopping mad. It's not that George likes rough trade, anonymous sex, and recreational drugs; in our far-forgotten youth, ModFab's editorial staff enjoyed those as well. But when you start splattering the entire gay community with your trailer-trash behavior, it's time to put down the coke mirror and take a good, long look at yourself in it.

Earlier this week, Georgie got caught diddling a flabby guy in the woods. Did he handle it well? No. His angry response to reporters: "Are you gay? No? Then f*** off! This is my culture!" And today, Queerty quotes George's defense against cheating on his longtime lover, Kenny Goss: "Gay relationships are a bit different. I'm sure we'll be allowed to roam if we want to. But we love each other dearly."

Four things I want to say to George:
  1. To suggest that your pathology for woodland gnome booty calls is part of gay "culture" is like saying that Mary Kay LeTourneau's fetish for underage students is part of straight "culture."
  2. Since gays are everywhere (and everyone), to suggest a monolithic single "gay culture" is ridiculous in itself. If you want to say your personal freakishness is part of "Badly Aging Faggot Pop Star Culture," then okay. You and Elton can work that out amongst yourselves.
  3. If I were Kenny, I'd leave you in a heartbeat, "open" relationship or not. Oh waitaminute...looks like Kenny has the same idea.
  4. You are now officially a public disgrace. Pull your shit together, and go back to work doing what you do best: making pop songs. Or even better: retire.
  5. For the last time, we do not want your sex. Now or ever. To quote another song of yours, you're just some fucked-up piece of ass.
Tags: , , ,


Post a Comment

<< Home