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Thursday, April 06, 2006

 

Our Long National Nightmare Is Over Begins

By now you've probably heard that, come next month, Katie Couric will no longer be sucking the NBC teat; she's to become the anchor of the CBS Evening News. Across America, people are weeping at the loss, rending their garments and cursing at the bloodless sky. The nation will never be the same. PopWatch gets all misty-eyed about Today with Katie, and asks if we will miss her each and every morning. Like we couldn't possibly wake up and eat cereal without her smarmy banter with Matt.

In a word, no. We will not miss her. Whatever charms Couric had -- bubbly personality, wide smile, optimistic charm -- have long been excised by her rampaging ego and unfortunate plastic surgery. We've avoided Today like the plague for the last few years...the commentary is insufferable, the product plugging is relentless, and the sight of a skinny Al Roker is unnerving. We don't watch the evening news either (BBC World, try it people), but for those who live and die by their television remotes, I hope Couric's new job puts her artificially raised eyebrows to better use.
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