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Sunday, May 01, 2005


Note To John Kerry: Fuck Off and Leave Us Alone

I've spent the morning reading reports that John Kerry has decided to run again for President in 2008. Unbelievable. This comes on the heels of Wesley Clark's all-but-admission that he'll run again as well.

Full disclosure: I was a Kerry supporter in 2004, after John Edwards dropped out of the race to take the #2 slot. But had Al Sharpton been the nominee -- heck, had Bozo The Clown been the nominee -- I would have gladly pulled the lever for him as well. The truth is, I was an anybody-but-Bush voter in 2004...he has (before and since) proven to be a leader of disastrous proportions, destroying our economy and environment while tearing apart other countries with no supportable basis. He is a liar, a cheat, and an embarrassment to intelligent Americans everywhere.

The fact is, Kerry should have knocked the '04 out of the park. He should not have only beaten Bush, but it shouldn't have even been close. But he didn't -- he tripped up over Vietnam and tax verbiage so many times that even I decided he was, indeed, a flip-flopper. (Unlike most, however, I don't consider that necessarily a bad thing...I think one man's flip-flopper is another man's careful consideration.)

Here's the truth: Kerry was so unlikeable that he couldn't win against a COMPLETE DISASTER, and it proved to the world that John Kerry hasn't got the three basic qualities it takes to win the American voter over: charisma, clarity, and a backbone.

You don't have to even have policy, or ideas. You just need to be liked.

As for Wesley Clark: he was always one of the hangers-on, like Kucinich and Sharpton and Braun. Clark never had a chance to begin with, but he (and they) stayed in the race just long enough to confuse voters, push petty individual agendas, and tear down the eventual candidate.

I say to Kerry, and Clark, and the rest of the 2004 fuckwads: you had your chance. None of you, Edwards included, should run again. That was your moment, and you fucked it up. Learn the lesson of Howard Dean, and realize that you can help the cause in other ways.

I'm not sure who should run in 2008. Maybe Hillary. Maybe Evan Bayh. Maybe Bill Richardson. Maybe Barack Obama (although I hope he waits until 2012 or 2016). But it needs to be a fresh voice in the race, a different kind of campaign altogether. I'm tired of these cookie-cutter democrats endlessly trying to court the imaginary middle -- as Bush/Rove proved in 2004, there is no middle anymore.

I believe that progressive thought still holds its best hope in the Democratic Party...although I'd now entertain a legitimate third-party candidate if they had winnable prospects. (Translation: Not Nader.) I believe that Howard Dean will run a seriously mean-and-lean Party for the elections.

But if John Kerry or Wesley Clark run again, I swear to heaven above I will fight them tooth and nail. They have proven the obvious: they cannot win. Step aside, boys.


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